Things I Wish I Had the Courage To Do

Learn To Drive: This is a big issue with me. I'm 34 years old, and I do not have my driver's license. I've never been comfortable behind the wheel. It's almost like I try to drive and the least little mistake I make causes me to fall apart. I'm always worried what the other driver's think of my driving(if I'm too slow, too fast, not turning fast enough, turning too fast, etc.). If I could get that worry out of my head, I can go places that I've never been able to go before, and I won't have to hear my hubby complain about having to take me wherever I need to go.

Publish My Own Book of Poetry: I am so negative about my own work. Everyone has told me that my poems are really good, but I just can't believe that they are. I love to write poetry, and I would love to someday be a published author, but my constant fear of people rejecting my work gets in the way.

Stand Up For Myself: I have a real problem with this. I am constantly letting people use me as a human doormat. I've never been able to stand up for myself or issues that I believe. I'm always afraid that other people will be upset with me, and for some strange reason, I just can't have that.

Self Confidence: If I had the confidence in myself that others have in theirselves, I could do so many things. I am the happiest when my nose is in a computer. I love to learn different things, but I'm terrified of making mistakes in front of people. I can't handle criticism very well, either. If I was beaming with confidence, I would have graduated from college, be working with computers, working with web design, and so much more. This is what my anxiety and personality problems have prevented me from doing over the years. I have basically become a turtle of some sorts and withdrawn into my "safe" shell. I would give anything if there was a magic pill that I could take that would make all of my insecurities go away. Later